Why did the tiger loose at poker?

• Because he was playing with a cheetah.

Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

• Because the captain was sitting on the deck!

Teacher:

• What a strange pair of socks Johnny, one of your socks is green and the other is red.

Johnny:

• Yes, it is very strange. I have another pair at home exactly the same.

Little johnny ask his mom:

• why are You painting yourself?

Mom:

• to look beautiful

little johnny:

• when it will start working?

Cop:

• Do you have any idea how fast you were going?

Driver:

• Isn’t it your job to tell me?

• Why a blonde bought a brown cow?

• to have a chocolate milk.

I have a fish that can breakdance, but only once.

Never break someone's heart, they only have one. Break their bones instead, they have 206 of them.

• Dad, I found our dog
• How many times do I have to tell you to not to dig holes in the garden

There are 3 people in the elevator: Santa Claus, a smart blonde, and a man: - who will raise 100$?

• A man will pick it up, because a smart blonde and Santa Claus do not exist.